Learning to Forgive

We’re certainly all different personalities and deal with life in various ways. Look up the Myers-Briggs Personality Test. You’ll probably find that you fall somewhere in between many of the categories which shows you that you’re a complex person. We all are, but this matrix helps you to determine where you fall in general, how you think about dealing with life, and how reactive you may be in being an active participant in your own life.

Being open to learning has been what I think is a strong point in my personality. I’ve been pretty judgmental of myself (as others in my life have definitely been towards me and I certainly understand) and I’ve learned that I’ve had to learn to forgive myself. Bottom line, we’re all human beings with our own brain processes that give us the tendency to respond to situations differently. God knows this, after all, he’s omniscient (all knowing). The important point I think is to acknowledge that you often respond to situations based on the veil over your psyche (that’s how I imagine it). I imagine that my thoughts are influenced by many situations I’ve been through in my past, like how I was raised, what traumas did I endure in my childhood, and what I viewed as lacking in my life as I navigated the milestones in my life. All of these things and more affect our reasoning and reactions throughout our lives, then there’s basic chemistry of the brain.

If you haven’t discovered by now, I’m super analytical especially when it comes to my mental health. I’ve had to be to figure out why I do/did what I do/did, how to learn to forgive myself (because it’s much harder as a human being to do this than it is for God/Jesus to forgive us. His love and ability to forgive is perfect, easy, filled with grace. Ours not so much. God’s way of forgiving is to erase the offense completely. Ours is more a “I forgive you but I just can’t wipe it out of my mind.” I honestly know that God knows how we work, how we cope, and sets the example of how we should strive to be. I’m also a firm believer in searching out just the perfect counselor to hear my thoughts on any given difficulty and help me navigate the road to wellness. As a Christian I’ve been told many times to pray to God for him to help you cope with a situation and this is so true. But as a human, sometimes we need a mental health professional to help us sort through our thoughts and arrive at acceptable conclusions for ourselves. This all depends on what type of personality you are. God gets that. It isn’t an all or nothing type of situation. We can arrive at acceptable conclusions in many ways and the professional counselor, psychiatrist, psychologist also is trained to help us deal with our thoughts based on our own belief systems. They meet you where you are (or should). If they don’t seem open to helping you use your belief system to develop your own conclusions then you need to look for another counselor. They’re human too, after all. It’s just like anything else, find the one that fits best with you. By all means, though, use all the resources available to help you. You deserve it.

Published by mud2porcelain

I am a Christian writer, aspiring to inspire, uplift, encourage and help those who are overwhelmed, overworked, over needed, or just at a difficult time in life. Being 64, married, divorced, now married to my high school sweetheart, having had 4 children, 10 grandchildren, and now 3 great grandchildren surely qualifies me to be able to discuss the difficulties of life even with a family without any bumps in the road. Just so you know, there've been plenty of bumps in the road. I've been down the wrong road, a muddy, deep rutted road, a dusty loooong road, and one that I've asked for plenty of guidance from those who felt they were qualified to help me. I'm a registered nurse with varied experiences including 15 years in hospice nursing, and still do some consulting and before that 30 yr + career many jobs to make ends meet. I'm also a sister, and a daughter to my deceased parents. My mother in law, who lives with us has "adopted" me as her daughter. Soon I will be embarking on an adventure of volunteering for hospice as well. While never wanting to do psychiatric nursing out of fear of the unknown, I found myself navigating my own lifelong depression and anxiety. My children also have varied experience with mental illness (a subject we all need to discuss openly). I have high hopes that this site can help and encourage you during your journeys as well.

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